Inquiries? Comments? Complaints? Sheer hatred? Please hit it with a stick? Too much glitter? Too little? Annoying as hell? RABU RABU ZURA? Plot plans? Sparkly tags? Will the commoners ever kidnap him to a long, distant island? Will the rest of the Host Club blow a fuse? WILL THE QUESTION MARK EVER FILE AN ABUSE FORM?

Leave everything and anything OOC-wise here, yo. I'll definitely be on the APPRECIATIVE side of whatever input you can provide. Thank you.

( stylistic choices :: character disclaimers :: personal ramblings re : suou tamaki )

( intended club events :: memo )


NOTE: I'll be leaving comments screened until I have the chance to reply to them, all right? ♥ Thank you very much for your feedback!

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The lovely Miss Blair Waldorf and the Host Club would like to invite you to the...

Come one, come all! Bring your loved one, bring your super shy, but secretly judo-master granny, bring your sweet puppums, and your pot flower too! Roses are red, violets are blue, dinosaurs are kind of SCARY, but I LOVE YOU! Don't worry, if you need help finding a date for the ball, we can definitely help you. Daddy knows some badgers and armadillos...

And even if life seems really-really hard right now, have no fear. You too can redeem your super special Evil Overlord rabu-rabu interest with the power of LOVE and BEAUTY!

Hmmmm... I suppose we'll need a storage hall room, and costumes, and music, and - entertainment! Who can handle that, hmmmmmmmmmm? Honey-senpai, sweets! Mori-senpai, furniture! Kaoru - I expect the best masks ever! Motheeeeeeeer, don't stand around, oi, er, look frightening - Haruhi, hold Daddy's hand some more, seeing the dinosaur card so close made Daddy weep, which is a PERFECTLY NATURAL AND PRINCELY REACTION.


[ ooc: ...I could not envision a tackier invitation card. And I tried. ]

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Ah - all this sad talk about home... and family... and... mmmm. That's not pleasant at all, is it? Being Tuesday, we should all be having tea instead.

You know, if I Daddy had to think it over, then the traditional answer is definitely the best one and not just because some very old person whose gender you can't really tell will hit you over the head with a tiny, sharp cane with a Hello Kitty handle, saying everything that's new is sent by the devil, or - or - BEREZNOFF!!!

Even so, I think you know what they say -

Home is where the heart is ♥

And with the right people, Home-away-from-Home is just as good. Thank you for being that kind of person, Citizens.

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Don't worry, stay relaxed: Daddy's roaming, so the streets are safe! And, er, hopefully, a much nicer shade of turqoise, when we're done: Kaoru, Honey-senpai, Mori-senpai, Haruhi - there has to be something we can do about it.

If you think Daddy's unprepared, you have another thing coming - in addition to the lethal Tama-kick and his suave charm, Secret Agent H - 0 - S - T has a super weapon - Bessie, the Justice Armadillo!



Evil Overlords, beware. Bessie and Daddy are undercover, so this is a really big secret, and if you're a meanie-type-person, just shut your eyes already, you're not seeing any of this! It's all right to cower too well, er, I suppose Daddy can hold your hand if you're really afraid, and don't worry, Honey-senpai doesn't get unleashed for biting privileges unless you do something super-ugly, like telling a pretty princess her new dress doesn't fit, or pu... shing... a granny...down... the... sta... staaaa... stair- BUT WHY WOULD YOU EVER, THAT'S JUST SO HORRIBLE, ROADS NEED SLOW DRIVERS TOO, AND LITTLE CHILDREN NEED THE LOVING WARMTH OF REALLY WRINKLED HAND HOLDING THEM CLOSE -

...you know, the world would be a much better place if every villain just took time off to buy nice hand lotion for his granny. Daddy can recommend you some. He uses five himself, you know ♥

Hmmm, you don't suppose Daddy needs more things, do you? More equipment? Where's a villain? Daddy'll run a pink-raid!


[ ooc: I'm sorry for the bad 'shop! It's supposed to say "JUSTICE" on the armadillo >D ]

Re... so... lu... tions...



1. make sure everyone still knows what that is, or how to do it, or how to draw it.

2. get Antoinette a new leash, because the new one's lost the glitter stars we glued on it.



[ ooc: Happy New Year to all of you! :D ]

( ][gift combinaaaaaatioooooooons!][ )

...Daddy has another idea.

And hmmm, you know, er. I never asked...

Just what is everyone doing for the holidays, anyway? Spending these kind of times alone sounds really-really sad, after all.


[ooc: eljay names not ic - included them so people, er, had some point of reference. Please pretend your character can only see the ch

Soooooooooo ~~~~~ ! Daddy's been thin~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~king. It's too late to hide now, perverted Twin. Daddy's already had an idea. OI, HARUHI, GET UP FROM UNDER THAT BED.

So Daddy thought, um, it's... holiday season... and even if not everyone celebrates Christmas, because it's not their habit, or their first choice, or because they... think... Santa's an awful menacing meanie... how could ever say thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!

Even so, there's no reason not to try and make this a nice time for everyone. We'll push it down to the 31st, so everyone can start the New Year feeling warm and a little fuzzy. Like having lots and lots of cups of chocolate and never getting sick. So~so, without further ado:

GIFT-GIFT-ZURA SURPRISE!



♥ leave your name, and write it all nice and shiny and clear, so if your second-grade teacher were here, she'd give you a big hug and not take away your candy and send you to the corner and makig you cry lots and lots, because the world's really mean, isn't it, and why's it all happening to Daddy, is it Bereznoff? I KNOW YOU'RE OUT THERE, CRIPPLING DADDY'S YOUTH, YOU DEMON! Your meowling battle cry won't get the best of a valiant prince - oh. Rest of. Er. Rules. Ehehehehehhehe....

HOW TO WIN THE GAME (OR PLAY REALLY REALLY WELL WITH CHERRY ON TOP OR MAYBE WHIPPED CREME TOO) ♥ look back on the third day, cause that's the magic fairy tale number, and every little wish comes true, then, doesn't it? Like glass slippers suddenly match, or apples make everyone feel nice, or the mermaid's not foam anymore. So check back on the third day, and see whom you should get a present for. ♥ keep it a secret! Lock your lips! And your teeth! And your tongue! And your squishy little plushie too. You can cosplay a secret-present-agent, if you'd like. Miss Miwako, wardrobe recommendations! Daddy thinks spandex and flamingo capes should be back in trend for supah-secret agents. ♥ get or make a present for the secret person you ended up with! Ah... don't... overspend, all right? It's not Happy Commercialism Day, or Happy Kyouya Day, so money doesn't really matter... besides, aren't home made presents the best, anyway? The lovely smell of a fair maiden's hands on the wrapping ~~~ ! ♥ deliver your present on the 31st. ♥ Enjoy yourselves, won't you? You... all really deserve it. Hug, chuu, cuddles, cooties. Daddy approves.

[ ooc: sooooooo, like Secret-Santa, or some such! If you'd like your character to participate, just have them submit their names - and-and-and if the character isn't one who'd naturally do this kind of thing, but you still wanna have them go ahead, just beg have someone else's character post their names for them? Tamaki wouldn't mind nagging people into it, but I do request that you arrange these things oocly, so people don't get forced into an activity they don't wanna deal with orz. I'll have a post with matches by Monday afternoon! Thanks for playing :D Also, all comments to this post = private to the Host Club. No threadjacking, alas!]

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Oi, Antoinette! It's a shameful secret, but... but... Daddy's put on a whole half pound! HONEY-SENPAI, I BLAME YOU FOR THIS COMPLETELY! It's all the cakies, every last one - well, no more! Nuh uh, Antoinette, we're going out for long walks, terribly long walks on sunny beaches and in fancy forests, ohohohohoohoohoooo, how romantiiiiiiic -

Ah, Haruhi, take care of everything while I'm gone for a bit, right? Daddy needs this walk really badly I'm not showing the horrible fat, am I?


[ooc: ...can haz no moar Hikaru. ._. He'll be taking his doggie on a day-long walk, ahhahaa.]

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How dare they doubt Daddy's wisdom, huh? Just look here!




WOULDN'T YOU WANT THIS ON YOUR LAWN?

Um. As a Christmas decoration.

Say yeeeeeeeeeeeees ~~~ no, he's not radioactive at all, why would you think that?! All Hosts sparkle naturally!